Are you a chronic worrier? Have you wondered how to stop worrying about reaching your goals?
‘Don’t worry’ is perhaps one of the most frequently and commonly used phrases of all time. Across languages and cultures, these two words make up a lot of dialogue between people throughout the world. However, it’s a phrase that’s not very effective and futile in most cases. Asking someone not to worry is a pointless statement unless you’re offering a logical reason and/or constructive suggestions. Hopefully we can try to dispense some good advice today.
Why do we worry?
Worrying is an unusual state of mind. We sometimes have control over it and yet sometimes it gets away from us. What we can do however, is control the level of worrying. You can choose to worry a lot, worry a little or not worry at all. At the end of the day, it’s all up to you. Our brain understands this well and somehow we still opt in favour of worrying. But why?
· Altering an outcome
We have it in our minds that if we worry, we might able to change the outcome of a situation. ‘If I’m constantly fretting over something, chances are I might break the spell and things might fall into place’. There is a level of superstition in worrying which can be unnerving but also comforting.
· ‘It’s the normal thing to do’
While a lot of people ask you to stop worrying about a certain situation. Strangely enough these are the same people that might ask you why you’re not worried about a situation (when you should be) triggering the big worry button in you.
· It keeps you on your feet
There isn’t a moment of rest when you’re an anxious person. A lot of people claim that worrying motivates them to think better and more logically. While this argument is flawed, doing nothing about a dire problem is also counterproductive.
· Better worry than sorry
There’s a very odd notion that rests in our heads – “If I don’t worry, things could become way worse than if I continued to worry”. There’s no scientific backing to this “what if” notion but it’s something so innate, it’s hard to let go of and see things in a more practical light.
There are many forms of worrying but let’s look at something that’s most relevant to you and the current situation – the fear that you might not be able to reach your goals.
The fear of failure is one that is on everyone’s mind. We constantly worry about not being able to reach our goals. This is a natural reaction to a setback – big or small. Now, we can’t promise that we can get you to stop worrying about your goals but we can surely help with reducing your stress to a great degree. How? Let’s find out.
· Be confident in yourself: No, this is not an overrated statement or a cliché. Unless you believe in yourself, you can’t expect others to believe in you. The second you start using positive statements such as ‘I can do it’, ‘I’m just as good as everyone else’, ‘If there’s anyone who can do this, it’s me’, you will see a world of difference in your outlook and your worries will start to disappear slowly, but steadily.
· Don’t get overwhelmed and overworked: Yes, there are goals that need to be reached and deadlines that need to be met and you are well aware of the fact. Take it one step at a time, one goal at a time. The more you try to accomplish in one go, the more overwhelmed you’re going to get and obviously what comes next? A whole lot of worrying.
· Focus on ‘right now’: Fortunately or unfortunately we’re either thinking about ‘what was’ or ‘what could be’ and these two thoughts dictate most of our day-to-day lives. Achieving your goal can become a very stressful and worrisome task if you’re going to live anywhere but in the present. Focus on now, focus on today. Everything else is just a distraction.
· Identify what motivates you: Everyone has something that makes them tick. For some it's exercise, for some it’s reading, for some it’s meditating and so on. You need to figure out what motivates you and use that to drive you forward towards your goal. You motivator could be in the form of an activity, a person, a pet or even a higher being.
· Don’t listen to anyone and everyone: Keep your goals and your dreams private. Or at most share them with those you find trustworthy and well wishing. The more you reveal your hopes and dreams to people, the more useless and unnecessary advice you’re going to deal with. And what happens next? You find new things to worry about and these worries will keep piling on. Find one solid support system and listen to them and only them.
Finally, you can reach out to us and we can help get rid of your worries about reaching your goals. With Up It, you can experience world class coaching that can get you focussed and help you reach your goals.
You can get a free consultation and then see if you wish to continue with our life coaching services.
It'll help to remember, stress less and smile more!