Updated: Oct 17
"Apne pair pe kulhadi marna" is a Hindi sentence which means "taking an axe and hitting it on your own feet."
Now you’d be surprised that more often than not we tend to harm ourselves.
Yes, we self-sabotage!
By the end of this video you’ll know exactly if you have been indulging in self-sabotaging behaviour and what you should do to overcome it. So stay tuned.
I’m sure you’ll agree with me that to stand in your own way of success isn’t a smart thing to do or the right thing to do. However, you’d be surprised that it happens all the time and the crazy bizarre part is it happens without us even realising it.
The psychological definition of self-sabotage is when your own actions hurt you and hold you back from achieving what you really want to achieve.
Examples of self-sabotage would be talking negatively with yourself, putting off things that you know that you need to be doing so procrastinating, excessive use of drugs, consumption of alcohol, even excessive eating and in the extreme case causing yourself physical harm.
The reason for indulging in self-sabotage could be associated with negative and self limiting beliefs which causes one to underestimate their own capabilities and to suppress their feelings.
Which is a very harmful thing to do!
Logically it would make sense that we do everything in our power to achieve our goals. But that isn’t the case because due to self-sabotaging behaviour we sometimes tend to act not in our self interest in fact we tend to act in the opposite direction.
For example, we all know that eating excessively and consuming junk food will not help us stay fit. However, we continue to consume excessive sugar and junk food. And even though this may not seem like a huge thing it is an act of self-sabotage.
Let’s say you want to increase your income but you don’t want to sit down and look at your expenses, that again serves as self-sabotage.
Choosing to act in a way that does not support you and serve you is an act of self-sabotaging behaviour.
Before we discuss further on how to identify and fix such self-sabotaging behaviour, comment below and let me if you’ve noticed personally any behaviour that has not helped you in fact which has worked against you.
In order to identify if you’re self-sabotaging then you need to check your behaviour if it is aligned with your goals. Let’s explore this further.
Irrespective of the goal you want to pursue for yourself, every pursuit of healthy goals big and small requires you to take action and it becomes simpler to take those actions when our behaviour is aligned with the goals that we want to achieve.
Our behaviour is the result of the actions that we take every single day. It is a pattern that takes some time to grow.
The actions that you’re taking everyday become your long term behaviour.
So if you’re not happy with the results that you’re getting then the chances are you’re self-sabotaging subconsciously without identifying this negative behaviour.
So if you find yourself not getting the results that you want then you may want to check your behaviour which is a result of the actions that you’re taking or not taking.
If you find yourself stuck in a negative pattern it is time that you may want to start thinking about changing this behaviour which is not serving you.
For example, if you find yourself constantly blaming someone, then it is likely that you’re repeating actions of not looking internally at your own self, at your own actions and avoiding taking responsibility, so you may want to check that behaviour.
So how do you get out of this self-sabotaging behaviour?
Here’s a simple formula that explains it best.
For the goal you want to achieve, you first have to look at your thoughts. So it is time to assess those thoughts!
Next is what do you do with those thoughts? Meaning what actions do you take?
So your thoughts, your actions and your long term behaviour will make it simple for you to move toward your goals.
So this will show you exactly if what you’re doing is moving you toward your goals or not.
That’s an acid test in itself.
If you say you want to achieve something but your actions are not lining up then it is simple that your behaviour is not in sync. Maybe because your thoughts are not in sync which will cause you to course correct and take the necessary action.
So if you say you want to achieve your goals then you’ll benefit greatly by checking your behaviour because your behaviour is a result of all the repeated actions that you do which is a direct result of what you think in the first place.
So don’t decrease your chances of reaching your goals by indulging in self-sabotaging behaviour.
Now that you know that this self-sabotaging behaviour can happen subconsciously you can become more aware of it and check your behaviour.
So to help you further we created a checklist that gives you all the critical steps that you can take in order to pursue your life goals irrespective of what they may be. So whether it is a career, relationship, health or even a hobbies goal. Check that out the link is mentioned in the description below.
So that’s my time thank you for watching. If you liked this episode don’t forget to like it and share it with a friend. I’ll see you next week.
And don’t forget what you want matters and it’s really up to you to make it happen.
Stay healthy, stay safe, see ya!